psychhh!!!!!!

haha...I dont even know how to begin this post. The post that sums up what exactly has happend these past 2 months. Its been a learning experience for sure. I basically learned that I'm still pretty immature, and most my instincts are horrible. But, with all that being said Utah is an interesting place. One, Its gorgeous, absolutley stunning. Two, its odd. And I will just leave it at that. No need to drag this out. Im coming home. Home being Arizona. Not Eastern Arizona, haha. But just back to where everyone I love lives.

Honestly, I am so tired of analyzing why I moved to Provo, why I wanted to leave Provo, and my motive to coming home. So, I have decided that if anyone asks, I'm just saying 'I dont know'. I am exhausted. None of it makes sense to me either. Lets chalk it up to me being one big giant baby. I'm honestly good with that, its alot easier to say that, then try and explain my every thought and emotion.

So, here goes nothing though, with me moving home. Im changing my attitude toward home. I am going to enjoy the heat while I can. I am going to work extra hard at being kind to my family. I am going to let my sisters paint my toe nails, watch The Notebook at 3 in the morning, and I will even let them read my love letters from Hayden...EEEKKK!!! Were going to get sooooo close with eachother. (thats funny people. Cause I know for a fact none of my sisters will take me up on that offer. Their idea of 'quality time' is making me sit in a hot SUV with their screaming children, as they scavenge a thrift store). haha, ok that was a bit of a dramatic illustration of our relationship. I know I will be able to count on Chea for a good soda on any given afternoon, Wendy will be the most willing to run with me, Heidi...well Heidi will just be Heidi, her and I can battle it out for who can be the most annoying. Chann, lives far away. Which means I can use her as my getaway. And I musnt forget my sister in laws, they got my back too. So, as you can see I have many people back home who love me. And I havent even mentioned my sweet loving parents, and my brothers. Its gonna be one big giant party. haha, like my enthusiasm?! I just turned something that was my worst nightmare 4 months ago, into a 'giant party'...oh I am going to get good at this positivity thing.

Anyway, so this is my summer sum up. But Im not quite finished yet. No post would be complete with out bringing up Hayden. He is doing so good, and getting skinnier in every picture he sends. I now am on the countdown. No longer do I say 'he's been out 12 months', I say 'he's coming home in 11 months'...that is the greatest feeling ever. Guys, this isnt some fake, made up thing. He is the greatest thing that has happened to me. And somehow were still in love. What a blessing.

Ok well there you have it. I keep making mistakes. C'est La Vie.