Saturday, August 7, 2010

Summer is FINALLY over!!


I am now back in thatcher! PERMANENTLY! Well for the semester that is, I have had cheer practice this whole past week for 4 hours a day, and let me tell you my body hurts in places that I didnt think you could hurt. Cheer is definetly going to kick my butt, and I say bring it on! The only downfall to being back to Thatcher is that no one is home yet, no one will show up for another 2 weeks, but its just cool to feel like I have got past my first milestone since Hayd left...my first summer with out him. Only one more summer, and then he will be home hahaha!!! So its been almost since 3 months that he has been out, and It looking back at it from May it has been emotional and extremely tiring, I could never do it again, I am glad that the initial pain and shock is slowly wearing down, cause man those were some rough 75 days, especially June...kill me! But what am getting at is that the way I am feeling and realizing now is that I on my way up. I can almost already smell Christmas, and from then out I feel like its cake. I remember in high school when I ran track and cross country, we would go out on long 4 and 5 mile runs, and freak did I dread them! But even worse than those were the track meets, running the mile was my enemy. But everytime I ran it, I would talk myself through the race. The gunshot that signified the start of the race always made me want to throw up, my body would always shake, kind of the same symptoms I had saying goodbye to Hayden. But as you run the mile its important to have somewhat of a strategy, you need to know how to fight for your spot, and keep up with the pack. Done and Done. I am in the pack, I'm at the point where I feel like I have a steady pace, and this is the part of the race where I tell myself ' Just breathe and Keep your pace'. I feel like I ya, the race has just began, but nonetheless Im in it. Time is ticking, and just like all things in life this wont last forever, it will end. Hayd told me that it will never again be two years, at this point its a year and 9 months, now doesn't that sound so much better:) My heart is full of intense gratitude, I am so lucky that summer didn't last forever, and that Heavenly Father doesn't leave us to struggle on our own. I am so blessed to have a scholarship at EA, or just EA in general, a place to go and have life experiences, its so nice to know that life goes on. As much as I hate that I am without him for 21 months, its nice to know that this is all happening for a reason. So yay for summer freakin ending, yay for growth, yay for EA (that rhymes), and yay for only 657 more days!!!!