Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Summer update: some vacations, some heartache, some new plans, you know the usual.




So, basically this summer was the summer of me and my nieces. We laugh all the time that we dont have any friends, and that we only have eachother. It could be worse. Anyway, we went everywhere from California to the mountains, but most of our road trips were spent going up the road to QT. one more reason were losers.




Im kinda sad I didnt have one single post during summer, thats not to imply it wasnt a good one. Just that I didnt have anything worthy to say. Did alot of swallowing. and now that that over, im ready to get down to business. Im alive. Im happy. Im forgiving. Im kicking butt.




Some days i feel like the first video, and thats okay sometimes you need to bleed a little love but once im done bleeding out all that love, I feel super light headed, and then I remember to turn my swagger on and I feel like this video. And if you didnt watch the full 4 minutes of Pretty Girl Rock, you cheated. go back and finish it.

Today Casey called me on his lunch break, the two of us are pretty good at complaining to eachother. Its just nice to talk to someone and not have a filter. So we get all of our negative feelings out and then hang up. Im not sure if we really even listen to eachother, its just the comfort of having someone to vent to. Well today he started out some big long negative theory on why his life sucked, and then he was like 'i know its not that bad, I have a job and a wife, and its not like Im missing an eye or a leg...' and then he just stopped and we both busted up laughing. And all of a sudden we couldnt complain anymore. Cause thats just it. We both have healthy bodies. We have jobs. We have plenty of people surrounding us who love us. End of story. Life is good.

Its been so easy lately to get upset, or discouraged. My body has aged like 40 years in the past six months. It makes it hard to do the things I love, hell it makes it hard to just walk down the stairs. And aside from that I have been working through a shit ton of heartache. But perspective is everything. Simplicity is where its at. Gratitude and forgiveness can heal any situation.

At the end of the day Im glad I have swollen fingers, at least I have fingers. Im glad my heart hurts so badly, it means something beats inside of me, I know how to love, Im glad im confused about what route to take with school, it means I am determined to get a degree, Im glad I spend too much money, it means I look cute everyday.

there is so much to be said about dissapointment and relying on Gods timetable. It truly is a miraculous and amazing thing. And the coolest part is that He never fails. Elder Holland said 'Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some dont come until heaven, but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ they come'.

So theres my little 2 cents/what I have learned this summer. I am the biggest work in progress. I never would have guessed this part of my life. It is playing out oh so very differently than what I had pictured. But you know what? Its still beautiful.